My Teenage life.

03-03-10

When life gives you lemons?

Wednesdays’ are sleep in days, though the neighbours decided it would be great fun to have a fight at two this morning, I was able to get up and dressed without being to tired.

When I got out of the car at school, I noticed my normal happy feelings, Today I noticed I was over him, he had no effect on me any more.

school went by very fast with this happy feeling, I welcome it with open arms.

the after school program I help out at was very fun today, Only because I noticed how appealing the guy that works there is, he talked to me for the first time which opened my eyes to his amazing body shape and face.

Also, in one of my classes I noticed someone, he is very misterious really, his dark fashion and hair, makes me dribble, he makes me want to talk to him. Get into his mind and find out what he is thinking, But as any teenager goes, I am very nervous about that, and rather think of myself as not very appealing as others he hangs around with.

I leave now with a happy note,

Life gets worse, but after every down there is an up.

Many welcomes;

Chelsea Waters*

Date; 02-03-10

Tuesday, oh how I am grateful you are over, Wednesday bares a late sleep in before dramatic school. I sit in my room now reflecting on the passing day;

Last night kept me up for some strange unknown reason, maybe it was like “Goodbye” the missed ex-boyfriend had said to me, he was to leave my life forever, I really do doubt he will keep out of my life for to long. He couldn’t possible think I wanted that, I hadn’t talked to him in a few days because I am trying to get over him.

The confusion of what a boy wants will forever make me wonder, for I have only ever had one love, that was him, he was my love, and now that I have ruined it I must live with this for the rest of my life.

He was a summer love really, started about the time winter tucked himself away and bright eyed summer turned her head. Meeting him was amazing and so what had happened when we started. Though I did love him, and he returned these feelings, we are only young, we will always manage to make a mess of things. He wasn’t a child like myself though, he was 18, he was ready to leave and be in the work force, and so he is now, but I am only young, I am still a student, I will never learn self control till something like that ruined it all happened.

Of not seeing him for two weeks; he did not seem missing me much. which hurt, and he did not wish to come camping with me, I felt neglected. My last night before coming back from camping I had befriended a boy who seemed very friendly, though I wasn’t able to see straight, we began to talk and before I knew it we had locked lips and this lasted for a while, till just before I could take control of what I was doing, I went back to my cabin tears in eyes.

The guilt was eating my insides, tearing my heart apart, the kiss was not meant, and before I knew it my boyfriend knew and we broke up a few days before Valentines.

Being single, after 5 months, is new to me, though now I get to check out guys surrounding me. But really I want to feel something again, but not with him.

Enough about my mistakes and past.

When I woke this morning I felt like I was carrying a thousand pounds under my eyes, sleep was lacking and it affected me gravely as I almost fell asleep in my performing art technology and then again at lunch time.

Coming home wasn’t what I really wanted, to sit in my room, till I remembered my room wasn’t anything like it had been when he used to stay over.

So, I leave with  a question,

Why is it I do not want to sleep at night, but never want to leave my bed in the morning?

Dawn is beautiful enough to drag me out, is she not? but Father moons’ light shines and keeps my room lit as I sit  on my cloudy bed.

Many welcomes;

Chelsea Waters*